Snoochie-Boochies

Ok so I went and had my hair cut today. I feel a bit like Samson. It's all a bit strange, after all it's been over a year since I've had even moderately short, afro-lite, hair.

 

I almost got a standing ovation when I walked in. They're an odd lot these barber-types. Mind you, I'm not exactly complaining. Having three women fussing over your hair is never really a cause for complaint. One of them, while she was washing it looked up at her colleague and went "Oi, Stace....come here and feel this hair!" Such attention is surreal, and part of the reason why I had it removed. Yeovil is a lot nicer when you aren't being stared at by every single person that walks within a 10 metre radius of you. (Somerset is hardly the most culturally diverse of places). I can feel the breeze now. It's quite pleasant. Although one downside is that apparently now I'm actually intimidating, the hint of friendly fluffiness has kind of evaporated. I might be able to run a comb through it now though.....for now........

 

Give it a month.

 

Sigh.

Right!

 

It's been almost half a year since I last posted seriously 'pon this 'ere space, which is a bit rubbish really. Well considering I finally have some time to update you good people on my summery escapades, it shall be done.

 

Barcelona was fantastic. I wasn't really prepared for the heat, and the great thing is that as soon as one stepped out of the hotel, one's feet began to cook. You could feel it. I now know what beef jerky feels like. Anyway, the hotel we stayed at was wonderfully situated, just off of La Ramblas, a huge street with a promenade running straight down the middle filled with various stalls, street artists and cafeteria seating. Barcelona has many things about it that London should most certainly attempt to emulate:

 

1. Litre glasses of beer out on the promenade.

2. More street theatre.

3. A fully functional AIR-CONDITIONED tube system

4. Opera for about a fiver!

 

Now for some of these, barring the latter, there are excuses for our great capital city. The tube for example, our London Underground is quite possibly the only tube system in the world with its own song. I couldn't see a couple of doctors making up a lyrical ode to its Catalonian equivalent. Moreover, as Mike rightly pointed out, there is a certain sense of character to our beloved tube. It has evolved as the city has evolved. Mornington Crescent could never be a game in Barcelona. The Spanish equivalent of Bond could never meet with his/her 'M' in an abandoned tube station simply because there aren't any! As for the beer, well I dread to think what British yob culture would do if litre glasses of beer were made readily available. Mind you, the continent manages to pull them off in classy fashion, something I fear Britain would be less able to do.

   Anyway, the week was spent in great fashion, checking out a park of Gaudi's design, sampling mountains of paella and tapas, and going for rowing races on a nearby boating lake. Other highlights included an incredibly dunken (and the largest yet) game of Big Booby on the beach, Jo asking "why do cars in foreign have dust?",oh....and Mike being asked to write a part for a film script before he'd even left the airport!!

   Musically, I think we went down pretty well out there, one of the children at the boating lake even shedding a few tears as we left because they didn't want us to go. Either that, or they'd just imagined Dan's superhero alter-ego 'Blue Lightning'. I mean seriously, the last thing that any sane person wishes to see first thing in the morning is a man who could in all fairness be Iggy Pop's long lost love child prancing about the room dressed only in the skimpiest of vibrant blue briefs. Mike may well have hidden under his duvet. I know I did!

Fast forward a week or two and suddenly I'm all set to easyJet my way out to Geneva. What?! I hear you cry. I know it was very un-me. As a student with no money, suddenly frantically trying to accumulate 300 odd quid to fly out on less than four days notice to Switzerland, literally just dropping everything and legging it to Europe, doesn't really sound like me at all.

WHICH IS EXACTLY WHY I DID IT!

 

And also to wipe the slate clean and make a fresh start with Hanna,a nd what better way than to fly several hundred miles for her  For the past two years or so I haven't really been me. There have been moments and flashes of me but slowly they've been beaten back by negativity, laziness and depression, things that got worse on coming to uni. Suddenly over the last few months someone has come into my life who has tried to hack her way through these things , and its been a rollercoaster ride. But this felt like a new step. After Barcelona I've felt this new surge of energy. My creativity has started coming back, my will to do things has started to feed back in. I'm sorting out my driving, I'm writing and practising with my guitar for two hours plus every day, and I've re-taken up my sax. But I'm getting ahead of myself here.....

Switzerland was lovely and all that money, all that strange spontaneity that had seemed so alien, was forgotten and paid off when I first caught sight of her at the airport. Everything after that was bonus really! But what bonus! Geneva is beautiful, especially at night. The first evening there we had a lovely meal and then went out for a walk around the main harbour, the huge jet of water in the centre of it, towering magnificently into the sky. We caught a movie in the outside Orange cinema that happened to be in English, a black comedy called 'Keeping Mum' starring Rowan Atkinson and Maggie Smith. It was wonderful, absolutely wonderful, and as the night really set in, the lake shimmered spectacularly with the lights from the city's buildings. It all felt a bit rom-com, an observation made at the time that proved to be incredibly apt.

   The next day we were planning on going swimming, but we got warned off because of a huge malevolent-looking cloud that seemed itching to spew forth much rain and lightning. It didn't really, but it did send the temperature plummeting somewhat. We ended up exploring the old town instead; the cathedral bells were playing all sorts of tunes, one of which I recognised as a Bach piece I'd doen for my Grade 4 sax, which was pleasantly familiar. We found the old town led into the main shopping area of Geneva, think Knightsbridge but with no traffic and lots of sibling-formed musical quartets lining the streets  making money for various conservatoire tours. Needless to say, Hanna went shopping :) We went strolling again in the evening down by the waterfront, and , having introduced her to coconut ice cream the day before, we purloined a couple of cones to ease the addictive pains. There was some community dancing going on in the bandstand in the Jardin Anglais so we stopped to watch for a bit. It was absolutely engrossing and there were so many people there old and young. Fflur would have loved it !

   Our thrid day in Geneva began slowly, checking out literally bang on midday before heading over to Manor, the best department store/supermarket I've ever seen. And the food!!!!!..............fresh pizza, foccaccia and bruschetta at incredible prices. I got a MAHOOOSIVE slab of margherita foccaccia for about 2 quid. TWO POUNDS!!!!!!!!!! Possibly even less. Bliss! Anyway, after munching and reclining somewhat in the shade, we finally got out on the lake. We rented a pedalo for an hour and took to the water. It was lovely, idyllic even, and so peaceful. They had a regatta on so the other side was inundated with yachts of varying colours and sizes it was gorgeous. After that we went for stroll through some botanical gardens up to the UN buildings. Unfortunately we were put off by some rather intimidating guards toting rather large machine guns, so we thought it might be best if we simply headed back to our hotel, grabbed our stuff and boarded a train for Lausanne.

   Lausanne is steep. The hills are large and irritating, especially in 36 degree heat for someone who overheats terribly like I do! But that's pretty much the only bad thing I can say about it. We grabbed a couple of kebabs after checking into our hotel (which was a lot nicer than I'd expected it to be) and munched out in an area of the town called Bel-Air. Yes I know. I was singing the theme tune incessantly....well, until I got very firmly told to stop! Lausanne had a wekk-long free music festival going on that we decided to check out. It was brilliant. There was so much going on there! An African band had already started as we got there, but they were awesome, and we just jumped straight in and started dancing. There were loads of food and drink stalls as well, perfect for grabbing a cool beer after frenetic dancing. There was even  an AC/DC tribute band! But the highlight of that evening was a folk band, complete with accordion and a seriously funky doublebass, who just set up shop on one side of the festival and ROCKED!!! They were fantastic, and no-one was sat down for long, soon EVERYONE was up and dancing. It was one of the most enjoyable evenings ever :)

 

We decided to make the next day quite leisurely. We went up into the forests north of the city and up a fantastic wooden tower that offered sublime panoramic views of the city and the lake (photos soon to be facebooked). The transport systems (whether just for the festival or what) were excellent. The buses were brilliant and always on time. The weirdest thing was that no one checked for tickets. The Swiss just don't break the law, everything runs on trust! Now that definitely wouldn't work in Blighty! In the afternoon we went for a wander down into Ouchy, the fishing village by the lake that Lausanne expanded into. Ouchy was beautiful. Everywhere is so clean, and there were paddling fountains and people were roller skating everywhere! It was like days at the seaside before Britain got chav infested. It was glorious, although I did end up getting soaked by a couple of little kids who'd escaped from their mum and decided to terrorise anyone near the paddling fountains. Little bastards! They made a baby cry.

 

Saturday was all about Montreux. We caught a train out to the Jazz festival going on there. After a McDonalds lunch (yes, cultural I know) we headed on a 45 minute jaunt around the lake east of Montreux until we came to the Chateau de Chillon. It rose out of the water majestically (more facebooking coming soon) and was pretty damn cool. So naturally we went for a bit of a gander. It was beautiful and incredibly well preserved/restored and reconstructed. In the courtyards they had some pageanty sort of things going on with a tawny owl (which my mum would have LOVED!). After getting back to Montreux we met up withh Stina who kindly gave us free food tokens cos she was working at the festival (much love for that Stina thank you) and we ended up staying for quite a while. After watching a fantastic big band play there were some truly stupendous fireworks to celebrate the festival's 40th anniversary. It was truly impressive and lit up the whole of the lake . A quest for sanitation in the aftermath was halted as our collective attention was grasped firmly by a North American Indian band. They were so good that I had to get a cd. Great stuff! The train journey back was dominated by the revelation that Hanna had sung before the queen in an internationally renowned choir!!! I was astounded! But seriously....how cool is THAT?!!!!!! Cracking!

 

Sunday was wonderful. It was my favourite day by a long way. We spent most of it down in Ouchy, and initially disappointed by a slight knockback from the rollerskate-hire place we strolled down to pack in some........MINIGOLF!!!! It was brilliant, quality stuff. There was a shot Hanna played that some divinity must have decided to intervene upon because the only imperfection in it was that it orbited the hole after heading straight for it! The park in which it was set was wondrous though. There were so many people outside playing, and so maqny facilities to choose from. Just down the road was Bellerive Plage, a massive swimming complex. There were numerous volleyball, basketball and tennis courts and several metal goals for football. And everyone was playing, young and old, children and young adults alike played with their parents, something you just don't see in Britain any more. It really was lovely. We just chilled out under a tree for hours chatting. It really was one of those places that you could spend hours in and not even notice. A slight bout of sun-induced wobbliness on my part kind of nullified the roller skating plan unfortunately, but we did end up going back down into Ouchy eventually. As it was the last night we kind of treated ourselves to dinner on the lakefront. The waiter was impressed with our smatterings of French and kept topping up our wine glasses which was nice. It was a gorgeous meal. Hanna had an exquisitely prepared curry that was full of flavour, and I plumped for Perch in butter sauce that had been freshly caught from the lake. It was sooooooooo good!!!!!

 

 

It was such a nice week both in terms of the company and the situation. But as I said, it was all made worth it just in that first moment when I saw her at the airport. It's a really uplifting feeling when a huge block of fear starts to disappear. I lost a great deal over the last few years, but it seems to be on the up again.

 

I've still got that tune stuck in my head.  x

 

 

Come into the forest,

Come and follow me.

Place your hand in mine, she said,

I can set you free.

 

Let me be the piper,

Do not be afraid.

Place your trust and faith in me;

It shall not be in vain.

 

Let me take your heart in my hands.

Let me take your soul.

Let me have the air that you breathe,

I need this control.

 

You were warned, she told me true,

Yet still you made your bed

And in that mess you now must lie;

My words inside your head.

 

When the smokescreen disappears,

When the walls cave in,

You won’t know the way back home,

You won’t know where to begin.

Sorry it's been so long folks, thought I'd dust of this space of mine and crack on with a bit of inane postage.

 

Where to begin, so much has happened. Well, Dan and I have been making good on our resolution to hit the gym three times a week, although visibly it ain't making much of a difference. Sigh. The implosion of early term seems to be well and truly past, and the nuclear winds have gone leaving the plains of RHUL with totally cleared air. It's all good in that respect.

 

GUNS! Lots of guns. A new obsession seems to hav gripped the male contingent of the group. Ladies, we can't explain it to you. We know that it seems silly, but you really do have to be male to understand a moderate obsession with projectile weapons. Plus they help when you're stuck in the middle of an essay and the plastic cup on the other side of the room is mocking you ceaselessly.

 

Housing has been finalised for next year. I think we must have had it ludicrously easy as we've pretty much just pinched the house off Lisa meaning that bushel-loads of time has been saved, paid the deposit yesterday which left a nice, hefty hole in my bank account. Don't even get me started on finances!

 

Reading week was largely uneventful, although somehow I still didn't manage to get to sleep before 3 am....thank you Fflur!  Absolute Dirty was AMAZING though. Oxfam is officially the greatest store on earth (anyone who tells you otherwise is lying)! Where else would you find an electric blue cowboy hat, a leather mini waistcoat and a studded gimp glove for less than a tenner?! I have to say, getting dressed up as the Village People and performing the YMCA to a moderately packed union hall was brilliant. I have never felt as much like Tom Jones in my life! Screaming women? Check. Smooth moves? Check.....Someone even chucked a fiver at us! Of course, then Mike and Dan got their arses pinched by assorted men. Mike, the gay-icon that he is, even acquired a stalker, who then moved onto Glen after finally realising that Mike, despite looking like he might enjoy a spot of bum fun, was in fact straight! Fern alleges that there was a male person looking for the policman, but thankfully that was never realised. It's funny, doing the YMCA got more female attention than most of the union nights combined! Madness!

 

I'd try and explain the sorry state of my love-life at the moment, but it's too complex for words. Suffice to say that it is pretty much entirely all my fault. I seem to attract romantically tragic situations!

 

Don't even get me started on Boundaries of Performance. Matty C is going to feel my wrath for putting us through that court experience. He is going to wish he'd never been born.

 

Toodles for now!

Back at RHUL and it feels like I never left. Really good to see everyone again. Roll on another term of frolics and fun!!!!

Suppress the urge to vent, keep to your heart

The scarlet humour that directs your thoughts.

Do not let show such emotions, stand fast;

Keep civil tongue ’gainst everything you’ve fought.

They must not see you falter, fall and fail

You must not let the faintest expression

Of darkness or ill fortune creep again

And give you ideas above your station.

But what of the rage that resides within?

What of the inexplicable sadness?

Replace those questions with a plastic grin,

Manufacture packets of happiness

Do not let the mask slide from your face

Never ever let them see you cry;

You have no right, your tears are out of place:

Deprived of focus, lacking tragedy.

Jump when they indicate, dance when they say,

Affix your smile once more, it helps to hide;

And yet sometimes you get lost in the play

And all that clouded vision slowly dies.

Do not deny that there are instances

Whereby that frown is wiped clean from your brow;

Forgotten are your mental grievances

Remembered is the pleasing here and now.

Jack Black: "I'm touching the beast..."

 

Inspired. Worth the admission price alone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is really only one thing to say about that concert:

 

 

 

 

 

 

I turned up to my Writing and Perfromance class today utterly hungover and totally out of it in more ways than one, and then had to act as a female embodiment of sexual frustration because my 'friends' thought it would be funny.

 

Sigh.

 

I really am a dancing bear aren't I?

 

i feel like I haven't posted here in weeks, which is actually pretty accurate. Anyways....the englefield green pub crawl was a huge success (in terms of batteredness) and a bit of a failure (we pretty much ground to a halt at the Happy Man!) Mind you, I can't think of anywhere better to ground to a halt at! Guy got absolutely engrossed in the whole adventure, in fact we were slightly scared that he was going to produce a volume of instruction thicker than the bible on drinking games and rules. The less we say about Matt and Pete the better, I think

 

Stefan is actually psychotic. WHo in their right mind would set off a flare in the middle of the street (pictures to follow shortly). He's absolutely nuts! Hilarious though.....i went into his and Mike's room the other day, Mike being Mike was still in bed at 1 in the afternoon. Stefan walked in, stumbling and bumbling as if he'd been hit over the head repeatedly, and said in his dubious German accent "You see the orange juice?.....I tasted it twice today!" It took a slight translation from Mike for me to realise that he had in fact chundered everywhere after drinking said orange juice....hence the tasting twice. Don't ask. Suffice to say Stefan won the empty bottle race, his Tesco Value Vermouth bottles overtaking the more varied assortment of Amaretto, Vodka and Absinthe of Mike. That vermouth is VILE!!!!!!!!!!!!! But he puts it away like petrol into a car.

 

Found out yesterday that the really cute girl from my english seminar has a boyfriend. Not only that, but I know the guy, play cricket every (well.....most) sundays with him, and happen to think he's a bit of a dude. Sigh. I love irony.....NOT!

 

Was out on the balcony with Dan the other night with a glass of whiskey in one hand and a cigar in the other, pretentious or what?! God I love being a student!

Yet he was jealous, though he did not show it, For jealousy dislikes the world to know it.
Author: Lord Byron (George Gordon Noel Byron)
Source: Don Juan (canto I, st. 65)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yesterday rocked some serious ass! I think the genuinely AMAZING combination of pizza, alcohol, Slackers and copious conically shaped spliffs heralded a pretty fantastic night. I might not sound much on paper (or screen if you're being pedantic) but sitting amongst quality mates, utterly smashed off your face, while watching the Dave Chapelle Show and giggling uncontrollably has to be concrete proof of a seriously good night.

 

This morning hurt.

Monty Python should be compulsory viewing for everybody. I've been reaffirming my faith for all things Python over the last few days in a valiant attempt to lift my spirits from the pits of diseased dejection (well....something like that anyway). Mike came up with a new challenge the other day: you have to watch the 'Biggus Dickus' scene from the Life of Brian and attempt to 'do a centurion' (i.e. not laugh). I swear it's actually impossible, wetting selves may have been involved.

 

Had a REALLY weird dream last night about magical wigs......sort of like Mr. Benn, but concerning hair. Don't ask.

I am SO pissed off right now! Dom rang earlier and said that they'd just been watching Hundred fucking Reasons at their union. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?! I'M FUCKING ANNOYED. IF ANOTHER DJ WANKER GETS INVITED TO OUR FUCKING UNION BEFORE SOME REAL LIVE MUSIC IS PLAYED, I'M KICKING OFF. SOMEONE WILL PAY FOR THIS!!!!!!!!.............phew.....that feels better now.

Relationship triangles are fascinating, OC-esque entities....but I think we've surpassed even that. For here at RHUL there's a new one that's been invented: The Love Quadrangle. Picture the carnage - Guy likes Girl who likes another Guy who likes a different Girl who seems unreadable. It's like a four lane roundabout with no exits and oil slicks everywhere. Plus.....one or two have severe communication issues.

 

BRING ON THE WEIRDNESS!!!!!

God bless Big Booby and Mortal Kombat at 2 in the morning!

 

Burst into Guy's room round midnight, he'd just got back from his pub crawl. Was floating in the middle of his room like a zombie on sedatives. Gave me a beermat and then began pulling off his trousers. I left....swiftly!!! Unfortunately W squared seems to be no more. Don't know why, but something has definitely changed....Leave a message at the door, hugging not required . Oh well....

 

Had forgotten just how good the OC is for dealing with teen angst. Dan and I watched about half of season two atfter our compulsory visit to Crosslands the other day.

 

Made an absolute arse out of myself yesterday and became the first triple-knob in history. But things on FM 270.28 still not good. I don't what, if anything, I've done, or how to fix it. Besides, communication is hardly a forte of mine.

 

SIGH

I still can't believe that I'm actually a university student! I mean....ME?!?! I haven't been up to a huge deal of critical stuff.....lectures and their ilk. Inductions mainly. It seems that while every other department has like 3 hr inductions on just one day....the drama dept has two all-day-long tributes to ridiculousness. The evenings have been cool though. I've met some wicked people (my next door neighbour is an old friend from NYT!!!), and have had THE most randomly un-PC convos with this hilarious little clan of fellow freshers.

• Day 1: Learnt the 'Big Booby Song'....am probably one of the only guys in the world to have mastered it along with Naomi's (the girl from NYT's) boyfriend, Adam.
• Day 2: Had an in-depth convo concerning 'penii'...the plural of penis.
• Day 3: Got utterly freaked out when at lunch, the girls hit me with a barrel of menstruation jokes involving vampires  am scarred for life. Also hideous un-PCness involving arthritis and cock shaped stress balls.

Alcohol has been heavily involved in many of these. There hasn't actually been a day yet when I haven't pissed myself laughing. Freshers' Night on Monday was carnage, and then had to wake up really early on Tuesday morning for 3 hour drama practical torture.

Sigh. My liver is being truly punished!

My room is seriously nice. Spacious, comfy and with the best view EVER! It looks out over the North Quad of the Founder's Building....although the fire alarm at 8:30 every monday is more like a fuckin siren! The only really annoying things are that you have to strap on walking boots and hike a ways to reach the nearest shower, and that I can't really get the Net in my room....weak signal.

I have to say though, that I can see this shaping up to be utterly fantastic.

Catch ya on the flip side!

You know how when you've had shit week or so, there's a point that you can pinpoint where things went sunny again. That happened to me tonight....where all my cares just melted away. Now the person in question will probably go bright red when she hears this, but I don't care....in fact it's kind of an aim with this entry. There was a concert on and I walked in through the doors, and just visible over the mass of people in front of me was Sarah. Now you know in movies where the romantic leads are looking across the room at one another, and everyone else fades away to move in slo-mo and the world grinds slowly to a freeze? It was just like that. And everything felt good again when she smiled.

 

SO THIS IS JUST A MASSIVE BLOGGING THANKYOU!

 

With lots of hugs and stuff.

 

In the words of Michael Stipe "It's been a bad day". You know those days where everything goes wrong....well it wasn't one of those. I can deal with those. Today was one where mind-numbing boredom leads to far too much thought; and as everyone knows, too much thinking is BAD. So you try searching for anything to do to take your mind off of these thoughts, but the results are meagre, which leads to more frustration and sullen thinking....which is worse. So now you're in a totally negative place, a black cloud hanging over your head in highly cliched (but still fairly accurate) fashion.....AND IT'S RAINING. But not a proper downpour, or irritating mist....this is the most annoying rain ever: The Great British Drizzle.

 

All I can say is thank god for tenacious d. There's nothin like a bit of Jack 'n' Kyle to cheer you up, even if it is only temporarily, and I swear that if I didn't have two cats and a guitar I'd go insane....well more than usual anyway. There's nothin short of punching something that lets out stress quite like cranking the distortion up to full and crunching out supposedly tuneful power chords that are warped beyond all recognition by the glorious fuzz of amplification.

 

GOD BLESS THE STRATOCASTER!